Everything i...

Everything is so fuckedI have until Monday, and then I'm going to decideDo i continue with all this bullshit?I have five options, according to Conlon and various others...***Leave school and get a job (highly possible)***Change schools (no, i like this school, i just don't like year 12)***Drop out now and recommence year 12 with the current year 11s (at least they are nice, with the exception of one PURITANICAL CHRISTIAN)***Do year 12 over two years***Stay in schoolAny other suggestions?I hate it, everyone is so awful. Everyone just says "cheer up, they are jealous" BUT THEY HAVE NOTHING TO BE FUCKING JEALOUS OF!!!!Everyone thinks I'm a brain or something, but they are so dead wrong.Everyone thinks I'm confident or something, but they are delusional.I can't figure out if I'm bored, or struggling, or pissed off, but I defintely know the system sucks.My "friends" are all cunts, with the exception of people like Gen. Thank you.I really hate this, and I don't know how to express it, or how to keep on track. You really learn who your real friends are. I'm going to name a name, first period of English, Roberta said to me "Let's do our English oral together when it comes up, I think we work really well together." (direct quote) But when it came to studying for history she told tomassini that i am impossible to work with and don't want her help, despite actively seeking it. She couldn't even tell me to my face. All i did was stand up for myself, because i'm sick of being walked over and now everyone is against me. It's not even most of their business, I just wanted to try and get a working relationship going with the girl, but she became colder and colder. It hurts so much, deep inside. i feel fucking helpless and used and I'm just spiralling downwards, into the abyss.i feel so used. They all want to take take take, but its like i'm banned from getting anything back. I feel drained. I feel sick. I hate everything. I hate everyone. and i can't decide who i hate more, them for fucking with my head, or myself for not fucking this all off earlier.

today is a sad day

The world has been thrown into yet another senseless and unnecessary war by a self interested president who seeks only to place another dictator in iraq, only this time sypathetic to the US' interests, namely, oil. We have seen this throughtout South America. George W Bush, who doesn't even deserve the title "man", is an awful THING who has ignored the UN and set a precedent of defiance. THe UN will be doomed to the fate of the United Nations. Roosevelt would be spinning in his grave, as would dear Eleanor. This thing is elected to control the largest economy and largest cache of destructive weapons in the world, by a nation of people, amongst which voting is not compulsory. This thing is elected by the majority of the minority, when the elections run fairly. George W Bush was elected by the US High Court.George Bush may state humanitarian reasons as his grounds, but the US is the capital of the ulterior motive. Do the words "MArshall Plan" ring in anyone's ears? Every war is fought on economic grounds, be it land grab, colonialism or control of a countries resources.Australia cannot afford to participate in this war. We must readjust our priorities. Greater funding for universities, Medicare and environmental intiatives needs to be undertaken, not to mention serious funding of the PBS or a realistic Austudy payment to full time students. What about fostering Australian scientific and creative talent, creating intiatives to keep them in our own god damn country. We couldn't even send a PEACEKEEPING force to EAst fucking Timor without having to have an additional tax slapped upon us.I'm too fucked up to seriously write about all this, anyone who wants to know, come have a chat to me.In other news, I couldn't go to the protest as we had to see the play "Stolen," which is one of our English texts. It's about the stolen generations of Aboriginal children.My thoughts: (This will make sense if you are familiar with the text)***Jimmy was played really well and convincingly. Sandy lacked the ability to make the audience emphasise with his plight.***The text was edited well, with greater interaction between the main characters. In the text the action is very stop/start and jerky. The stories intertwined much better in the play. I asked the director about what her intentions were in editing the play, ie emphasises and fluidity changes, and she replied that it was for the above reasons.***The character of Anne was extended, her issues explored in greater depth. She was played very well, and her last scene (with improvised dialouge) was incredibly touching. The actress said that these were her improvements, as she felt that Anne's personality crisis was not adequately covered in the text.***I felt Ruby could have been explored in greater depth. I didn't feel her character came to a conclusion, unlike the others.***The play used some good non-naturalistic dramatic "functions?" such as exagerrated movements when playing white characters, wearing white clown noses. The set was simple and fucntional, using lighting and props to make use of a large open space and depict settings. I like the way Jimmy's cell was depicted, using a rectangular green light projected unto the floor, which he lay in.People were exceptionally rude during the performance, laughing inappropriately and talkign throughout. A group of yobbos thought they were at the cricket and tried to begin a mexican wave. At the end of the performance, the actress playing Anne quite bluntly said that she was disgusted that they were up there, telling their stories and opening up to the audience and being laughed at in return. It was a good call.I had to take public transport home, scarily and got home at quarter to eleven, It's weird, people don't bother you on the streets normally, but in school uniform i was petrified. And my git of a mother thinks that sucking up to me with bourbon makes up for it.. pfftlol

1. Name: L...

1. Name: Lise2. Birthday: 28th of October3. Zodiac Sign: Scorpio, don't fuck with me4. Sex: yes please!!5. What time is it? 11:17pmLAST PERSON WHO..6. Slept in your bed: Me, and my cat7. Saw you cry: Gen8. Made you cry: She knows who she is9. Spent the night at your house: Piercer boi11.You went to the movies with: Urmmm.. Can't remember12.You went to the mall with: The mall? WTF is this? I went to Norflandz with my Mum!13.Yelled at you: Tomassini14.Sent you an e-mail: vicGreens list15.Said they were going to kill you: The entire teaching stuff (i really AM the most hated student is that wretched place), special emphasis on Mr Fuller, probably Johanna O'Farrell, most likely former "friends" same ones who made me cry, this list is going to go on for a while... Better question, Who doesn't want to kill you? My cat, coz his claws can't stretch far enough...HAVE YOU EVER..16.Said "I love you" and meant it? ARAGH, i hate to admit it, but yes.17.Gotten in a fight w/ your dog/cat/bird/fish,etc? yes, i play war games with my cat and a mop, on the veranda, with a south african accent...18.Been to New York? Nein19.Been to Florida? Nein, you have to be retired or drug addicted to venture there.20.California? Nope21.Hawaii? Nein22.Mexico? Nah23.China? Nope24.Canada? Nein25.Danced naked? yes, but only with the cow runs away with the spoon26.Dreamed something really crazy and then it happened the next day? YES!! i hate that!27.Got a really bad feeling about something then it happened? yes, i have an arsehole detector, pity its sometimes defective and i get close to wankers. it breaks down when i encounter the opposite sex28.Stalked someone? No, been stalked, yes!! you know who you are, stop!29.Had a mudbath? yes, it was called rutherford park, year 8 camp.. volpe really copped it30.Wish you were the opposite sex? nah, they have ugly genitals31.Had an imaginary friend? i imagine that my friends are good people, does that count?32.Apples or bananas? bananas for headaches, apples for thirst33.Red or blue? red, a bit of blue34.Backstreet Boys or N'Sync? how about. NO36.Spring or fall? both are nice, autumn is wonderfully tragic, spring is my birthday an it bursts with life. Actually, maybe autumn coz i hate it getting hotter...37.Santa or Rudolph? rudolph, he likes carrots38.Maths or English? English!!!!!!!!!!! Duh39.What are you going to do after you finish this survey? WATCH PRISONER!!!!40.What was the last food you ate? a hippy pill41.High school or college? they call it a "college," but they are just big noting themselves.42.Are you bored? yes, i am in high school and being treated like shit by all involved... it dense, suffocating and i can't see the point in completing my VCE!!43.How many buddies are on? 7, stace, klucky, ness, mat, matt, gareth and ben44.Last movie you saw? the beginning of rabbit proof fence in Mrs O'Shea English class, as b/g to Stolen45.Last noise you heard? Diamandia GalasABOUT YOUR FRIENDS... 46.Laughs the weirdest? Dane47.Will grow up and be a model? Tash48.Going to have the most kids? SARA! lol49.Have you known the longest? Joe50.Is the loudest? Maz51.Is the quietest? ROB52.Do you have the most classes with? Christine (kinda acquintance)53.Is the weirdest? Bastard, lol, you know ho you are54.Is the funniest? Gen/Maz/Volpe55.Is the moodiest? Alex56.Can you tell most of your secrets to? Same bastard in 5357.Who you usually go to about all of your problems? Same bastard, otherwise no one, theyt don't understand the contextTHE LAST FEW QUESTIONS... 58.Last time you went out of the state: January60.Things you like in a girl/guy: complimentry mental incompetency61.Weirdest thing about you? why don't you make one up, people usually do62.Do you have a crush on someone? yes, but not someONE... it'sd a crush not a lifelong pledge of committment!!63.Do they know? i think so, i dont know65.What's his/her name? doesn't that completely fuck up question 63?66.What do you think of ouija boards? not somthing to be taken lightly67.What book are you reading now? The Essential Writings of Karl Marx68.What's on your mouse pad? Dust69.Favourite board game? Monopoly, the inherent evils of capitalism in a box!70.Favourite magazine? Not a magazine person, maybe Rolling Stone or something gratuitous and girly71.Favourite smell? sunshower smell, its hard to describe but its vunderbar!72.Worst feeling in the world? impending war73.What is the first thing you think when you wake in the morning? "fuck this"74.Do you like scary or exciting rollercoasters? scary, the excitement is a secondary feeling75.How many rings before you answer? at least 276.Future daughter's name? Ebony Rose, Elspeth Morrigan or Lily Fior77.Future son's name? Alexander, Dylan Lysander or something, i had this discussion with someone ages ago78.Chocolate or vanilla? strawberry79.Do you sleep with a stuffed animal? i had my bear, and a red devil named fred after fred nile, but i lsot fred.. i think maz pinched him, lol80.If you could have any job you wanted, what would it be? I DONT FUCKING KNOW BUT IT WOULDN'T BE ANYTHING VAGUELY LIKE YEAR 12 AND ITS INHERIT BITCHINESS82.Are you a lefty, righty or ambidextrous? i'm so left i'm right, oh, you are talking about hands not ideologies?83.Do you type with your fingers on the right keys? half, half84.What's under your bed? a trundle full of junk85.Favourite sport to watch? cricket, footy86.What time is it? 11:17pm (my clock froze at the start of the survey)

hehe, more silly quizzes.. why do i keep getting the fkn goth ones!!

Which Stupid Stereotype Are You?this quiz was made 5by ErinAre you British?this quiz was made by ErinCLOVES- Oh youre so goth even your cigarettes areblack What Brand of Cigarette Are You?? brought to you by Quizilla

Bet you practic...

Bet you practice Wicca or Paganism or possibly more liberal Christianity. You probably love Dead Can Dance, anything ethereal, and might be vegetarian. You probably also like to hug people. What kind of goth are you? Created by ptocheia

arag...

aragh, i'm smoking too much! damn stressI drink too many v's! damn homework!anyone got any other suggestions?my mother suggested evening primrose oil, damn smartarse hippiesa "friend" is being really nasty to me, but apparently can't bring to tell me whyjust go on whispering, bitching and walking away man, that's really what i needanother is accusing methe first thing i learnt this year is who my friends arei went to the HTAV australian history lecture today, it was really good The first lecurer turned ou t to be the author of our textbook, that's a turn up, isn't it?i recorded both lectures, with my spangly little dictaphone, but only people i see fit will have access to the tapesi went and collected my "collect 15 coke labels and get a discman" discman today from norflandz... seeing as i always blow up the stupid things 15 labels and $35 is a good deal

bleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

hrmm.. headachy... taking a break from text and traditions studying stuff... meh meh meh, i dunnnn get itttt...I'm fully obsessed, opressed, upset, depressed (hey! that sounds cool) over schooly, preferency, ENTERy stuff at the moment, and other people aren't helping. Year 12 is suck a crock. PEOPLE REALLY HAVE TO LIGHTEN UP AND STOP BEING RUDE TO EACH OTHER, OUR YEAR LEVEL HAS BECOME SO COMPETITIVE AND BITCHY, HINT HINT.Career options:Can anyone imagine me as a good teacher?A good lawyer?A good journo?A good dole bludger?Thought for today: "i'm not afraid of standing still, I'm more afraid of being bored, I'm not afraid of speaking my mind, I'm just afraid of being ignored." - jACK OFF jILL...